I love Disneyland. I love the parks, the movies, the characters, the music, the history, the hotels, and even the much maligned Disney food. So on our family’s last vacation to Disneyland I decided to take special note and care when we ate at some of our favorite Disneyland food spots.
My initial goal was to debunk the claim that you just can’t eat healthily at Disneyland, which is widely spread through blogs and popular press. However, upon examination of the issue, I realized a couple of things: (1) Defining “healthy” is just too vague and controversial in the first place. Some associate the word with their favorite pseudo-scientific fad diet others mean something grossly reductive and misinformed like veganism. (2) Even based on existing nutritional standards and scientific evidence, as published by such sources as the National Institute of Health, it is pretty clear that Disneyland just isn’t going to cut the mustard. That is, even by existing standards, attempting to call Disneyland food “healthy” in any way is an exercise in futility (the popular, conventional consensus seems to ring true).
So I am abandoning that quest and going after what I’d call “good moderate” food at Disneyland. Where can THAT be found? The answer, I think, is essentially just as Disney claims in their literature: most everywhere offers some kind of alternative to the madcap culinary debauchery that can be found in such Disney famed food as the Monte Cristo Sandwich or the Red Wagon Corn-dog. So, as is often the case, the truth about the food at Disneyland resides within some nuanced place between heart-attack inducing hell and the claim that Disneyland offers healthful alternatives. I’d say that, contra Disney themselves, there are really very few truly healthful alternatives but at the very least the alternatives are good enough to to keep you from feeling sick (if you're used to eating like our family does) if not good enough to keep you from becoming constipated.
Here’s my quick, synoptic condemnation of Disney’s food and their claim to offer healthful options (why they are wrong):
1. There are no nutrition facts given for ANY meal at any part of the resort and until this information is posted for the public then their claim is only as substantial as the paper their words are printed on. People with special dietary needs required to maintain their health, such as people on medically prescribed low sodium diets or low cholesterol/low saturated fat diets, or carb counting diabetics, absolutely need to know what they’re are eating in detail and no meal can be counted as healthy unless it can be coordinated within these special parameters. Too much sugar might mean too many calories for a typical Disneyland guest but too much sugar can be harmful, even dangerous to a diabetic.
2. There isn’t enough of the green stuff. While it’s true that you can get fruit at numerous places in the park (and that you can almost always get fruit instead of french fries) the fruit is typically just nutrient poor grapes or melon and it is just damn near impossible to find any nutrient rich vegetables outside of carrot sticks, broccoli, and nutrient poor lettuce. Broccoli and carrots are both healthful heavy hitters but you can’t achieve a well rounded diet just eating those.
3. There isn’t enough fiber. Finding beans, whole grain bread, or whole grains of any kind can be a real chore at Disneyland and the consequences aren’t very pretty if you’re staying for an extended “resort” vacation. The only consistent way to get fiber was to hunt down oatmeal in the morning but even that isn’t enough at just one (expensive) bowl for an entire day. It may sound funny but sufficient fiber is essential to good digestive health and Disneyland can’t be called healthy until they remedy this.
4. There is too much salt in everything, even the “moderate” choices, and too much salt just isn’t moderate no matter what you claim in print.
5. There just isn’t enough variety. Don’t want french fries? Fine, you can have “fruit” which translates to “you can eat a bunch of grapes and honey dew melon”. Like I said above, Disneyland just doesn’t give you enough variety in terms of produce and this means that across an entire day everyone there, even if they’re really trying to eat right, aren’t going to be eating very balanced diets. It would be great to see more greens (even one source of collards or kale...I mean no collards in New Orleans? Are you serious!?) and more vegetables. Also why not more opportunities to eat beans and rice (whole grain rice/brown rice)?
At the same time Disney has to be praised for their valiant attempt, especially with regards to their children’s meals which always allow parents to choose healthier options for their children.....though this pretty much means your kids will eat salmon, grapes, and carrot sticks with 1% milk for every single meal they have!
So the food's not so healthy given these considerations but at the same time the food's not so bad either, if you make the right choices. To highlight this I will review a series of popular Disneyland eateries that purport to offer healthy alternatives. I will start from what I take to be the worst, to the very best. I can’t remember the author or the name of the name of article but I recall reading an LA Times article about eating at Disneyland that accurately offered the following sound advice about coping with food options at Disneyland: If you can get over the the fact that everything is expensive and nothing is great then you can really enjoy the food at Disneyland. I would add if you can get over the fact that little is really “healthy”, in-spite of whatever green checkmarks Disney might ascribe to it, you can still have a good time eating at Disneyland.....though you will be poorer for it, for alas, the healthier food is also often the most expensive.
Without further ado, here are what I take to be the best (and some of the worst) restaurants at Disneyland for people with healthful eating on their minds (minus the Napa Rose, which I’ve eaten at but not recently and not with writing anything in mind....it’s very good, it’s expensive, and I am not very sure about how healthy it can be or not).
Tomorrowland Terrace (avoid) - the terrace offers both lean fish and chicken sandwiches on whole wheat bread with fruit, which makes it a tantalizing alternative to the pizza and pasta dishes of Tomorrowland when you’re in a bind....unless of course flavor matters to you, at all. The food here is actually the only time that I completely hated what I was eating at Disneyland: iceberg lettuce that came out of a plastic bag, dry/bland chicken, stale bread, colorless tomatoes, and something called “avocado salsa” (what in the hell is that? do they mean guacamole only with very little avocado?!). All of this means that you are probably better off just grabbing a banana from the nearby fruit cart. The service is also absolutely the worst I have ever seen at Disneyland. I waited for 20 minutes when I had one other person in front of me, it was a surreal and jumbled experience. Avoid it like Han Solo avoids tie-fighters!
Tengora Terrace (avoid) - What’s with the terraces at Disneyland? While not as horrible as Tomorrowland Terrace I’d avoid this Disneyland Hotel fast food spot, even though they do have a really interesting breakfast menu. I’ve attempted to eat both their oatmeal cakes and the tofu/egg white casserole thing but both, at two different visits, were so over encumbered with oil from the griddle that I had to get something else. It’s a shame because they have such a quirky menu and what I think is a brilliant logistical format where you can order and customize your meal with a computer based touch-screen. The only problem is that the final product never turns out as good as it sounds. I’ve eaten here three times in the past and I probably won’t ever again.
River Belle Terrace (meh) - Rounding out my three least recommended eateries is yet another terrace. The food isn’t awful but it isn’t any good either. Helpfully, they offer a variety of putatively healthful snacks throughout the day. In the morning they have a fruit platter (with copious portions of grapes and cantaloupe....and two strawberries) and they have non-fat milk. In fact, they are the only place in the park where I know you can find non-fat milk (1% is widely available, thankfully). At night they have bland, semi-decent sandwiches and rarity of rarities, you can get beans. Again, thanks to Disney’s failure here, it’s anyone’s guess as to how unhealthy these dinnertime meals are (how much saturated fat? salt? added sugar? etc) but at the very least they MUST be better for you than a corn dog or fried chicken at the Plaza Inn! Oh and they have the Mickey Mouse pancakes (bad for you!) and their sitting area overlooks a beautiful portion of the park. It’s probably a great place to see Fantasmic.
Carnation Cafe (meh) - It’s heresy for many people to say but I really don’t care all that much for the Carnation Cafe. The cute setting and the fact that you can watch the parade down mainstreet while you eat makes it worthwhile (once) but I don’t think the food is very high quality or very well prepared. Maybe this is because I don’t eat the chicken fried chicken or the meatloaf? We went there because they had vegan burgers on a day wherein we already had eaten enough animal protein. It came on a whole grain bun, of sorts, and was made of white beans but it also seemed to be pretty heavy in additive cooking oil. They also had this romaine salad with shrimp that was truly awful. The shrimp were tiny, salty, and had a dull faded color. They were obviously frozen at one time but I’ve had better tasting frozen shrimp from microwavable trader joe’s meals, and those suck. The lettuce was just as limp and lifeless. But the parade was awesome. Only go if you’re trying to watch a parade.
Blue Bayou (mildly recommended) - Blue Bayou is all about the experience as opposed to the food, though I am pretty sure the intention is the other way around. For about $40.00 a person you would expect to eat something extraordinary but the reality is that the food at the Blue Bayou is only cafeteria quality (if cafeterias served lobster tails). However, there is no denying the fun ambience of pretending to have a high quality lunch on the bayou at nighttime. Recently they have attempted to revamp their menu to appeal to the more health conscious: adding “micro-greens”, subtracting cheese stuffing from the salmon, adding a rack of lamb dish that comes with beans instead of their incredibly decadent au gratin potatoes, etc. I recommend the salmon with risotto and I do not recommend the extremely salty, pasty, and grossly overrated gumbo. By no means is eating there “healthy” but I think everyone ought to do it once, especially if you love Pirate’s of the Caribbean. Be sure to make reservations though, it’s the toughest restaurant to get into at Disneyland (though I’ve managed to eat there more than once as a walk in, during the summer, by showing up between 2 and 4 pm).
Storytellers (mildly recommended) - We ate at Storytellers both for dinner and for the character breakfast with Chip and Dale. The breakfast is one of the better options in the whole park and they have an egg white & spinach omelet that if prepared with less oil on request may truly live up to the name “healthy alternative”. It’s also the cheapest character breakfast at the resort since you can order off a menu (avoid the buffet) but the price is that the characters your family will meet are extremely obscure. Meeko from Pocahontas? The bear cub from Brother Bear? Really? While the food is decent, and the dining room nice, the service really sucks, but Disneyland food service, outside of Napa Rose, pretty much universally sucks so there is no point in mentioning it as a deciding factor. Oh, they also have grapes with cantaloupe and whole wheat Mickey Mouse waffles para los niƱos.
Paradise Garden Grill (recommended) - Now for the good stuff. Stuffed in the back corner of the worst part of the entire Disneyland resort, the Paradise Pier, aka Disney’s Knott’s Berry Farm, is an obscurely named mediterranean eatery that is easily one of the best in the park if only for the fact that it’s a nice change up. But it also happens to be very tasty too. Too bad it isn’t as healthy, oil free, or low in salt as I would like but, again, we’re looking for moderation at this point, not perfection. They also have a tofu vegetarian skewer that comes with the standard skewer vegetables (mushrooms, peppers, onions, and zucchini) and it’s a pretty good way to squeeze in a little more produce into your day. The rice is tasty but greasy. The pita is delicious but if you know what’s good for you you’ll just ask them to keep it. My favorite part? It’s counter service, which means no bad Disney table service and since the seating is outside and along the parade route you might be able to land both an early dinner and the Pixar parade as a two for one!
White Waters (recommended) - Hidden pool side, not far from Nappa Rose and the super special hotel guests only entrance to DCA, is this mock up of a real-life shitty cafeteria as found at campgrounds and lodges across America. Only this one is a little less shitty. For breakfast calorie counters can score a reasonable bowl of oatmeal (I ask for no sugar added), $2.00 bananas, and low-fat milk and yogurt....pretty danged balanced and nutritious for Disneyland. Even better is their semi-decent (though salty) chicken and guacamole sandwich that you can get with a mass of grapes, however, you’re going to have to make a special request for their dry but much healthier whole wheat bun instead of the HUGE chunk of ciabatta that it comes with. Come on Disney, don’t you know what the people who order a chicken breast/guac sandwich are looking for?! And if you decide, for a moment, that you just don’t care then the nachos are amazing. They’re covered in fake, ghetto processed cheese but that’s just part of why they’re so good....they also come with decent guac, sour creme, and your choice of salty chicken or beef. I think it’s one of the greatest, tastiest, unsung junk foods that you can get at Disneyland. Yes, better than then overrated corn dog! (Mostly because it succeeds at not being a corn dog).
Jolly Holiday (recommend) - Mary Poppins is one of the best Disney movies so a bakery themed after the film is something to get excited about, plus Disneyland does have a well deserved reputation for churning out decent sweets. But what if your a joyless scab like me? Well don’t worry, there are some healthier things lying about. The most promising is the chicken and lentil soup since its a rare source of lean protein and fiber and their health staple is the whole grains/grilled vegetable salad. Both sort of taste like salted ass but you’re not going to find tons of alternatives so just suck it up. The crazy giant sandwiches on the other hand aren’t so bad, at least in terms of flavor. Did I mention they have good treats? Who am I kidding. You go because they have Disneyland coffee, which is better than Starbucks, and good treats. Try the fruit pie!
Cafe Orleans (highly recommended) - Essentially a cheaper, less atmospheric version of the Blue Bayou (they both feature the Monte Cristo sandwich of death) Cafe Orleans might very well be my favorite place to eat in the park all things considered. Aside from the beautiful Disney surroundings of New Orleans square, which matters, they offer a great way to get a bunch of greens and some decent salmon at the same time. They also uniquely serve what I think is the very best Disneyland desert of them all, a caramelized banana stuffed crepe. Add some very good espresso and you have yourself something special and for damn near half the cost and hassle of the Blue Bayou. It’s still not super healthy, I’m obviously indulging if I’m eating a crepe, but they have greens! Greens at Disneyland! It’s a big deal.
Bengal BBQ (highly recommended) - A favorite of Disney buffs in the know and for good reason. The prices are unbeatable and it’s an amazing option if you count calories or try to eat more nutrient rich plant based food. The only trouble is that there is no place to really eat your food in tightly packed Adventure Land. Just take a few skewers with you while you wait in line for the Jungle Boat Cruise or Indiana Jones.
Carthay Circle (highly recommended) - Disneyland’s premier restaurant, in the parks that is, brings the food and service of Napa Rose into Disney’s California Adventure for what amounts to a deliciously uncomfortable experience. Being inside the park there is no way that I or anyone else is going there with formal dining in mind, and I’m bringing my small children with me of course, but it’s formal dining that you’re going to have to endure and that comes with all the good and bloated over indulgent niceties that you might ever want, or despise if you’re like me. Obsequious yet delightfully competent wait staff and all. They have quality and unique offerings like ceviche with fried plantain chips and a soba noodle, vegetable, beef bowl option for kids instead of the tired salmon/pasta combo offered at every other Disneyland sit-down. It’s not exactly a health nut’s dream come true (they use too much salt and too many oils) but if you keep your portions under control you can have what might very well be the best tasting food available at Disneyland!
Steakhouse 55 - Nestled in a odd place, right next door to Goofy's Kitchen, at the Disneyland hotel is one of the best and most ridiculously expensive restaurants on Disneyland Resort property. What I like about this place is that it is truly possible to eat healthily here, if not for a very good price. For me, and for medical science, a healthy meal is nutritionally balanced and low in agents that can factor into health problems if consumed habitually. That is you can eat a low fat, low sodium, glycemically tame meal that is rich in stuff that your body's cells need to function properly.....only you are going to have to choose carefully and make some special orders. What I did was order a filet (lean beef) to share with my wife and then we ordered a bunch of obnoxiously high priced sides ($8 a pop baby) but without any added oils or cream: plain baked potatoes, and a special request of steamed spinach and broccoli, which they entertained. For the price the service is terrible and we waited a long time in an empty restaurant, but the ambiance, food quality, and shear customizability of our meal made it an overall good experience....an extremely expensive good experience. Plan accordingly.
Big Thunder BBQ (highly recommended) - My favorite by far in the park is the Big Thunder BBQ, where I believe that if you’re thoughtful, and exercise self-control, that you can truly have a relatively healthful meal and a very good time with your children: loud musical antics and no snooty waiters or misguided singles trying to ignore the fact that Disneyland is, was, and always will be a place designed for parents to have fun with their children. It’s a dinner show with all you can eat BBQ, which doesn’t sound very healthy but then you can order a vegetarian skewer that brings the much needed vitamin-C and lean protein (tofu) and the sides are great: you get beans! Real honest to God beans, and though sweetened a tad they aren’t prepared in lard. The cole slaw is also completely mayonnaise free. And get this, it’s actually pretty damn good BBQ, all you can eat chicken and pork ribs, and I say this as someone who was born and raised in Texas (though it’s doubtful that it is, technically speaking, BBQ....I’m pretty sure its not really smoked meat, but that doesn’t mean it doesn’t taste great!). If you stick to moderate portions of the meat, get the vegetable skewer, enjoy the beans and slaw and avoid second helpings, and skip the buttery corn bread altogether, then you can really make something special out of the meal. Every family ought to do it, though reservations are pretty much essential.
So there you have it. Disneyland, not healthy (at all) but by no means a death sentence. It’s actually possible to eat moderately and still not be a stick in the mud about every single meal, though, I will point out that the choices I’ve suggested above all run at the very highest end of the cost spectrum. You can eat cheaper there but unfortunately that means more often than not that you’ll be grabbing a corn dog or a cinnamon bun, etc. What I’d really like to see is someone come up with a list of suggestions for people to eat at the lower end of the price spectrum (nothing’s what
can be called “cheap”) and in a way that excludes the typical (yet excellent) advice of simply bringing your own food to the park because, after all, distance travelers don’t always have this as an option. I don’t really see a way to do this without being very redundant (eating the same stuff everyday) but perhaps there is a way! Disneyland is a very big place, after all.