13 + 1 Movies to Watch on Halloween

Here's my pick for the best Halloween movies, of all time. By Halloween movie I mean movies that go great with the holiday and not necessarily just "best horror movies". Indeed, some of these movies on their own merits, apart from the season, are really just pretty good.....and a few other are some of my all time favorites! My list favors movies with supernatural elements, pagan references, Christian themes, or explicit references to Halloween. So even though George Romero makes great movies none of his made my list because they opt for naturalistic explanations for the dead rising and though Hocus Pocus isn't exactly the greatest movie ever made, as a Halloween special, it's probably the most complete movie in existence. So don't be shocked, I'm not crazy, it's all about Halloween!

So without further ado. Here are 13 + 1 movies that I will watch all week long (and in fact have already been watching).

14. Corpse Bride (2005) - 79% awesome (21% food coming up from your stomach)- To date this is still the best claymation gothic family oriented movie ever made, a peculiar sub-genre dominated by Tim Burton, people associated with Tim Burton, and people attempting to be Tim Burton. 


13. Halloween (1978) - 82% awesome (18% watching Jamie Lee Curtis running errands) - The king of slashers is more funny than scary by today’s standards but it’s well made, has a great (if overused) score, Jamie Lee Curtis, and of course, actually takes place on Halloween night. One of the most celebrated horror movies + Halloween = must see on or around Halloween!

12. An American Werewolf in London (1981) - 83% awesome (17% Muppet dog attacks) - Intelligent, funny, and spectacularly gruesome story about an American backpacker who gets attacked by a werewolf, falls in love with an English nurse, and then turns into a werewolf himself. It also has the single best werewolf transformation ever put on film.

11.Donnie Darko  (2001) - 84% awesome (16% complete bullshit) - Something about time travel, parallel universes, and seeing psychotic visions of a giant bunny that says the world is going to end on Halloween? Yeah, I don’t think it makes any sense either but the stellar 80s soundtrack and constant surreal departures into the world of “what it must be like to abuse drugs” coupled with the pervasive Halloween setting make this one really fun. Just don’t take any of it too seriously.

 10.The Halloween Tree (1993) - 85% awesome (15% Hanna-Barbara made for t.v. budget) - A full length Halloween special written by Ray Bradbury and featuring Leonard Nimoy that goes out of its way to actually explain the historical and cultural significance of Halloween at the very same time? Nice. Too bad the animation is so darn generic.....and who dies from appendicitis? I don’t want to give away the ending but they don’t pull any punches telling kids about death and how we all become jack-o-lanterns after we die....hey, what?

9. Adventures of Ichabod and Mr Toad (1949) - 86% awesome (50% Wind in the Willows and 14% less interesting than the best Disney classics) - Packaged as a double feature with the Adventures of Mr Toad this Disney cartoon is still the definitive film version of Washington Irving’s popular ghost story. Plus Bing Crosby does the soundtrack! 


8. Cabin in the Woods (2012) - 87% awesome (13% drunken booty shaking) - If you’ve seen the original Evil Dead (the good one), then why not try a horrific, over-the-top spoof of the same story that puts a kitchen knife to the throat of the entire horror genre and makes a poignant criticism of its fans? Now what if it’s directed by Drew Goddard and co-written by Josh “the Avenger” Whedon and includes an ending so insane that I can’t even begin to describe it with words and do it justice? Here you go.

7. The Evil Dead Trilogy (1981, 1987, 1992) - 88% awesome (12% absolutely disgusting) - Evil Dead = The Exorcist + The Night of the living Dead + The Three Stooges. Evil Dead 2 = Evil Dead + Groovy! Evil Dead 3 (Aka Army of Darkness) = Evil Dead 2 + A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur’s Court. When taken together = a really fun time minus whatever food you attempted to digest prior to watching. It’s simple arithmetic.

6. Ghostbusters 1 & 2 (1984, 1989) - 88% awesome (12% Sigourney Weever copulating by Rick Moranis....and some guy named Janosz) - Ghostbusters is a nearly universally beloved comedy classic, but Ghostbusters 2 is also highly underrated and, heretically, my favorite of the two. It makes no mention of Halloween but you have widespread ghostly visitations from the dead and, according to Bill Murray, cats and dogs sleeping together. It’s a wild good time, bring the kids. They get free balloons.

5.The Shining (1980) - 93% awesome (7% unnecessary subplot about, well, something called a “shining”, that doesn’t really go anywhere) - There are two kinds of people, people who regard this as one of the greatest movies ever made (including me) and people who like Stephen King so much that they refuse to appreciate how incredible this movie is. I’ve never read the book and given that it’s written by Stephen King I won’t bother but Kubrick’s re-envisioned version sends chills down my spine. It’s Jack Nicholson at his best, it’s Kubrick at his best, and if you pay close attention you’ll find yourself wading in some pretty deep pools.....of blood that is.

4.The Seventh Seal (1957) - 94% awesome (6% existentialist bullshit) - This coffee house biscotti munching classic features a famous game of chess with death and a crusading knight who is looking for spiritual certainty as he approaches the end of his life. There is a ton of metaphorical imagery and bizarre religious apparitions throughout the film and references to the book of Revelation. It’s a great movie but I don’t think it’s really very coherent, much like Donnie Darko. At the same time it poses relevant questions made even more relevant by the celebration of Halloween, all saints, and all souls day. Does life have a purpose? Is there a God? Should I wear a scarf with my beret to see the important black and white foreign film? The answer to all three of these questions is of course a resounding “yes”.

3. Hocus Pocus (1993) - 95% awesome (5% scary premonitions about where Sarah Jessica Parker would take her career) - While it’s not as good as most of the movies on this list, I’m not silly, this is what I take to be the single most underrated Disney movie of all time. Far more engaging than the acclaimed/boring/ridiculous Nightmare Before Christmas. And it has everything you’d ever want in a Halloween movie: resurrected witches, a zombie, Bette Midler doing Screamin’ Jay Hawkins, children being murdered, references to the cannibalism (of children)....wait, what? This is a family movie? You bet your flying vacuum cleaner it is and it pulls no punches like that wussy assed Charlie Brown. This is the real Halloween family classic, unless you’re too cool to watch Disney but then you’re probably too cool to celebrate Halloween too. Hipster.

2. The Crow (1994) - 99% awesome (1% tragic legacy) - Brandon Lee was set up to become a bonafide superstar and then tragically died in the midst of making one of the best comic book to movie adaptations ever made. The plot is simple: take the horror genre and put it on its head where instead of having an undead, unkillable monster impose violence upon mostly-innocent victims you get an undead, unkillable monster who hunts down and kills a gang of depraved satanists set on setting the city of Detroit on fire the night before Halloween. Throw in one of best alternative rock soundtracks of the 90s (the best?), great acting, good writing stylish visuals, and lots and lots of ass-kicking and you have yourself a Halloween winner. Victims....aren’t we all?

1. The Exorcist (1979) - 100% awesome - Remember, there are things that you can’t unsee. Don’t say I didn’t warn you. Watch this Halloween night and then I’ll see you at Mass on All Saints Day!